I'm in (serious) trouble ...

Photo from TacoBell.com

Seriously, the moment I heard about it, I thought I was dreaming. I started salivating and I couldn't get it out of my mind. Kevin was just mentioning it to a neighbor. He had no idea how life-altering the news would be for me.

I quietly waited an hour, but then I couldn't stand it. I had to see if the rumors were true. AND THEY ARE.

Taco Bell is officially serving Doritos Locos Tacos.

I'm not going to lie - I was scared. My love of Doritos is hard to explain. When I was a girl hosting slumber parties three things had to be present: Oreos, Dr. Pepper and Doritos. Always Doritos. The Nacho Cheesier, the better! Why was I scared? Because I know me. I can't resist the draw of that taco treat. I'm pretty sure that will be lunch tomorrow since I just can't stop thinking about it. And my fear, understandably, came from the nutrition facts. I can't say no - I have to try it. I can already see the ten pounds I will gain because this amazing awesomeness is available down the street.

I bravely clicked on the link for the nutrition facts, tense and ready to be heartbroken. But the angels must be shining on my waistline ... The taco is ONLY 200 calories - for the supreme. And you can order it fresca style! Oh man, oh man, oh man. That might be worse for me, come to think of it.

Maybe it will taste awful and I will be spared. One can hope.

Put the chocolate down

I wish I could say I came back after vacation my new "usual" self - full of willpower and a renewed energy to maintain my healthy lifestyle.

Sure, I started my gym membership and had a pretty positive fitness evaluation (27.5% body fat is my best score ever!), but I missed my first session because a law school commitment took more time than I expected.

Also, I've eaten my weight in chocolate over the last week - at least.

First, Kevin's birthday was Thursday so I made him a pretty sunflower cake - at his request. I used my pumpkin trick and made it low fat, but the icing and buttterscotch chips (not to mention the Peeps) that topped it certainly weren't. Sure, it's about 180 calories a serving (entire cake is 20 small servings), but I ate AT LEAST 8 servings between Thursday and Sunday. I had two servings as breakfast Friday!

And don't even get me started on the leftover icing that I ate like it was going out of style - literally sticking my fingers in the jar at least half a dozen times Friday alone.

Then, Friday night at work involved checking the grocery department for expired foods - and a lot of chocolate was outdated and subsequently opened for our enjoyment. Officially, Cadbury's Picnic bar (with raisins and caramel) is the best candy bar in the world.

Guys, things were so bad, even Kevin turned to me and said "Are you ok?" I was gorging on so much chocolate I think he almost felt compelled to buy a pregnancy test just to allay his concerns regarding this unusual behavior. (I'm not, don't worry)

Now, it is the theory of my "trainer" that my body is craving sugar because a lifestyle like mine - 18 months of only 1300 calories a day - has possibly caused a low blood sugar issue. But I think that's crap. Low blood sugar (hypoglycemia) doesn't lead to cravings, it leads to much more serious symptoms that include trembling, clammy skin, headaches, and eventually seizures and coma. It does not include nonexistent willpower. Nope, this is nothing but a mental issue. And possibly a dehydration issue.

I read somewhere, years ago, that most times when we think we are hungry, we are actually just thirsty. Apparently, before engorging on a random snack, it's best to drink a glass of water, wait a few minutes and then evaluate whether you are still hungry. But I haven't been doing that - I've been going straight to the choco-crack.

And last night I figured out why: I'm bored with water again. I'm craving flavor and water just ain't doing it for me. It's a hard dilemma too - for every article you show me that says tea and coffee don't cause dehydration, I can show you another that says they do.

It just seems best to just stick to water. Sure, there is Gatorade and Powerade .... but those are meant to replenish nutrient loss like potassium and sodium after sweaty exertion, not to substitute h20. Besides, other problems come into play with each of the other favored "water-based" drinks like tea, coffee and sodas. So, what do I do? I'm not sure yet, but short of developing a chocolate water drink (we sell chocolate tea, by the way and it has me very intrigued), I need to find a solution soon.

Otherwise, I might slip into a chocolate-induced coma ... and that definitely wouldn't be because of low blood sugar! I did finally throw that cursed container of chocolate icing into the trash last night. And I woke up this morning feeling a bit less loosey-goosie and more in control of myself. Here's hoping!